Viral TikTok trend proves that society cages Nigerian women [Opinion]

Social media has seen different viral challenge trends come and go, but a particularly interesting one is the mum-dressing-like-daughter challenge.

Unlike some trends that focus on younger people, this one draws attention to an often-overlooked aspect in our society: the appearance of middle-aged and older women.

And it became a success for two reasons:

It is unusual to see an older Nigerian woman in an outfit society has come to associate with youthful vibes and flair.

The temporary makeover reveals the mothers’ desirability in spite of their age.

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Until Dey lodge one person mama before dem go rest 😂 https://t.co/9GDSibK3rx pic.twitter.com/v8A8Tw9VFX

— Gallantexchange (@adeyemigallant) May 18, 2025 As lighthearted as it may seem, we should be careful not to gloss over its implied meaning: yes, desirability for women is not tied to age, but no, the Nigerian society is, unfortunately, still too conservative for real change.

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The respectability politicsEven if it’s not, whatever is said long enough, for an extended period of time, can start to look and feel like the truth.

Now this is where the conditioning has played out: for many years, Nigerian women have been led to believe and accept that aging comes with an obligation to appear responsible.

Wrappers and boubous replace bodycon dresses, tight jeans, and short skirts as they near their 40s, 50s, and 60s.

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Scarves become favoured over freshly-done braids and modern wigs. Makeup begins to feel like a chore.

The few women in this age group who defy the stereotype are greeted with veiled disapproval and criticism that sometimes take the shape of concern.

And it is done to drive home the message that our society dictates what is considered age-appropriate dressing for women.

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The viral trend and its impactThe challenge has received widespread attention for exposing what has been long covered under the cloak of respectability politics in our society.

People have taken to social media to confess their shock once they saw a ‘seemingly old’ mother transform into a desirable sweetheart. The videos, uploaded originally on TikTok and then shared to Instagram and X, have completely gone viral.

Sadly, one can’t help but realise that the pleasant admiration that has welcomed this challenge across social media can quickly become radical condemnation — in fact, by the loudest voices during the applause.

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What can be doneIt’s not enough to champion the cheers and praises. It’s time to reflect on our selective decency.

Let’s be honest: older women who dress up in ways that are deemed unconventional for their status still arouse discomfort within us as a people.

It’s a shift we are unprepared for and, quite frankly, not equipped to handle — at least not yet.

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In that case, we will continue to admire from afar the bold mothers who stood up (and stood out) for this challenge (thanks to the daughters, too).

It’s a beautiful one, but unless we confront our respectability politics head-on, challenges like this will come and go without sustained impact.

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